Category Archives: asiangrrlMN

Mamas, Don’t Let Your Girl Scouts Grow Up to Work at Planned Parenthood

Posted on February 22, 2012 by | Leave a comment

My Angry Black Readers probably remember this post by ABL about the Satanic, lezzie, whore-making Girl Scouts as imagined by Indiana House Republican, Bob Morris (R-Jackholeville).

Well, I have some good news in the GSA department and some bad news – which would you like first?  Good news?  I would have asked for the bad news first so I could finish up with some good news, but I defer to the wishes of my readers.

The good news comes via Rachel Maddow.  This crazed bullshit by Bob Morris about the Girl Scouts was not appreciated at all.  Even some of his fellow Republicans thought he went too far – including the Speaker of the House Brian Bosma.  Speaker Bosma told his House colleagues that he bought 278 cases of Girl Scout Cookies in a 48-hour period in response to Rep. Morris’s incredibly asinine statements.

Bosma, R-Indianapolis, pointedly offered Girl Scout cookies throughout the day and munched them as he presided over the House.[...]

And when time came for the House to adjourn, he asked all lawmakers who had been Girl Scouts – and seemingly every female legislator stood – to give the daily motion to adjourn.

(Click for the GSA bad news)

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Posted in asiangrrlMN, Lady Bits, Please Die in a Fire, War on Women, What the Crap!?

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Shit! I Have to Tidy Up the Place for Yet Another GOP Herp-Derpbate! – Now with Bonus Chirpstory!

Posted on February 22, 2012 by | 9 Comments

Update!!!  My esteemed colleague, Ian, has put together a chirpstory – the best tweets of the debate – for the GOP herp-derpbate, and I have embedded the code below, right before I begin live-blogging the debate.  Enjoy!

*yawn*   *shuffle, shuffle, stop*  *peers around and tightens robe*

Down to the Final Four clowns!

What the fuck are you doing here?  The hell?  Another debate, you say?  It’s been so nice not having to listen to the GOP presidential candidates blather on and on and on and on and – do we have to do this again?!?  Oh fine.

*flounces to the computer and thunks down*

*drums fingertips on the keyboard, producing gibberish, which is still more intelligible than anything any of the GOP candidates might utter tonight*

The GOP herp-derpbate is taking place in Arizona tonight with CNN’s John King moderating.  He got clowned on by Newt Gingrich the last time he moderated, so expect King to get some of his own back tonight.

What will be on tap?  I have a hunch Romney will be asked about a certain local, hypocritical, blackmailing de-closeted sheriff.  Santorum will definitely be asked about his holier-than-God attitude in deciding who is a Christian and who is not.  By they way, Ricky, have you read Matthew 1: 1-5?  Fascinating scripture.  Really.  Or, as I like to say, don’t start none, won’t be none.  I have no idea what will be asked of Ron Paul, nor do I particularly care.  Is it just me, or has he fallen completely off the radar lately?  Couldn’t have happened to a nicer crank if you ask me.  As for Newt, the less said, the better!
(Click to snark at the herp derpbate with me!)

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Posted in asiangrrlMN, Election 2012? Oy vey!

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Am I “Awake” or Am I Just Dreaming?

Posted on February 20, 2012 by | 13 Comments

I don’t watch any TV series for a variety of reasons.  If I turn on my TV, I’m either watching sports or cooking shows.  However, I read about a show that piqued my interest because 1) Jason Isaacs stars.  He’s hawt and talented and did I mention hawt? and 2) the premise sounded intriguing.

Jason Isaacs plays a detective who crashes his car with both his wife and his son in it.  He lives in two realities – one in which his wife survives the crash while his son dies and one in which his son survives the crash while his wife dies. The way it works is that each time he goes to sleep, he wakes up in the alternate reality. Since I have very realistic dreams and a shitty time sleeping, the premise immediately appealed to me.

The show is called Awake, and it’s on NBC.  They released the entire pilot episode, and I watched with a great deal of  trepidation.  As I said, I don’t watch much TV, and I was so hoping this show would be excellent, while at the same time, I feared it would suck.

(click for more Jason Isaacs goodness)

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Posted in asiangrrlMN, Miscellany

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GOP Sez: You’re a Slut. I Sez: Maybe So, But Not For You!

Posted on February 17, 2012 by | 8 Comments

I’m thisclose to pulling a Lysistrata

Day-umn.  I went to bed in the year 2012 and woke up sometime in the 50s….the 1850s.  What with Darrell Issa holding his ‘no girls allowed’ panel on contraception* and Frothy Mix’s backer, Foster Friess’s advice on birth control, and I don’t care that he claims it was just a joke – hey, Foster.  You can have sex with the woman keeping her legs closed.  I’m just sayin’ – it’s not been a good week  for vaginae and uteri havers.  Let’s not even talk about VA and state-sanctioned rape because then I’ll have to go out and rusty pitchfork™ someone, and I’m not in the mood to put on clothes and leave the house.

By the way, what’s going on in VA is unconstitutional and will be challenged**.  In the meantime, countless women will have to endure having something forcibly shoved up their vaginae without their consent and for no reason at all except to slut-shame them/intimidate them into not having an abortion.  That’s rape, regardless of if it’s sanctioned by law or not, and there is seriously something wrong with the people who thinks this is perfectly OK.

Anyway, all this anti-woman bullshit is pissing me the fuck off so much, I am contemplating pulling a Lysistrata.  Oh, I can hear you protesting already.  You’re saying, “Hold up, asiangrrlMN.  Lysistrata organized the women of Greece to withhold sex with their husbands until they ended the Peloponnesian War.  What the hell does that have to do with this bullshit the GOP is doing?”
(Click for more GOP misogyny)

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Posted in A Wee Bit O' Hilarity, asiangrrlMN, War on Women

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Happy Valentine’s Day, Ladies of Virginia! Your GOP Hates You and Your Uteri

Posted on February 14, 2012 by | 21 Comments

For me? You shouldn't have. Really.

Hey!  Women of Virginia!  I bet you didn’t realize that on this Valentine’s Day, the GOP in your state have planned a special Valentine’s prezzie juuuuuuust for you.  It comes in the form of two very restrictive anti-abortion bills, and because they have a supermajority in the House, both bills passed in the House today!

The first bill says that a person is a person the minute a sperm and an egg collide, like two ships in the night.  In other words, a personhood bill, even though they don’t call it that.  The same kind of bill that, when put to the voters of Mississippi, it was soundly defeated.  It passed the House in VA, 66-32.

The second bill is the lovely, “Hey, we’re going to do a completely meaningless procedure before you’re allowed to have an abortion and stick something up your vagina at the same time” bill.  It passed the House in VA, 63-36.
(Click for more invasive probing by VA GOP up in your uteri)

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Posted in asiangrrlMN, Body/Health Shenanigans, Please Die in a Fire, War on Women

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Fox and the GOP Want to Wage War on Women? Game. On.

Posted on February 13, 2012 by | 21 Comments

Fox News is neither foxy nor news

In a truth-based universe, Fox News would have to call itself Fox Dispenser of Manufactured Sexist Racist Classist Homophobic Outrage and Bullshit*, but we don’t live in that universe, so they get to call themselves Fox News with nary an FCC sanction in sight.  Sure, once in awhile, one of the bobbleheads, usually Shep Smith, will slip up and tell the truth, but for the most part, they are there solely to incite their base and spread fear and hatred of the dreaded lie-bruls.

Therefore, the news that someone on Fox had said something inflammatory, ignorant, hateful, and downright nasty did not surprise me.  The fact that it was a woman saying mean, hateful shit about other women did not surprise me, either.  Let’s face it – any woman willing to go on Fox other than to combat the lies is going to be more misogynistic than the guys on Fox, just as any POC willing to debase him/herself by showing up on Fox  will say the most hateful racist things ever.  Why?  It’s the nature of the beast, the same reason why prominent women and POC in the GOP are so damned sexist/racist respectively – in order to make your way to the top in the GOP if you’re not an old white guy, you have to give them cover for all the hateful shit they say/do.
(Click for more non-news from Fox)

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Posted in asiangrrlMN, Body/Health Shenanigans, Fox News Fvckery, War on Women

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BREAKING NEWS: Karen Handel Resigns from Komen

Posted on February 7, 2012 by | 9 Comments

Let me play the world’s tiniest violin for Handel

Well, well, well.  Karen Handel, she of the Komen infamy, has resigned.  In her walk-away statement, she paints herself as the victim, naturally, and whines about how unfair everyone is being to her.   The whole letter reeks of bullshit and again underscores my earlier impression that Handel just isn’t very bright.  Let’s take a looksee at her letter, shall we?  We shall!

We can all agree that this is a challenging and deeply unsettling situation for all involved in the fight against breast cancer.   However, Komen’s decision to change its granting strategy and exit the controversy surrounding Planned Parenthood and its grants was fully vetted by every appropriate level within the organization.  At the November Board meeting, the Board received a detailed review of the new model and related criteria. As you will recall, the Board specifically discussed various issues, including the need to protect our mission by ensuring we were not distracted or negatively affected by any other organization’s real or perceived challenges.   No objections were made to moving forward.

(Click for more whinging by Handel)

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Posted in asiangrrlMN, Body/Health Shenanigans, War on Women

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Crazy Georgia Birther Case Update: President Obama is an American!

Posted on February 4, 2012 by | 41 Comments

Hiya, Angry Black Readers.  Remember when I channeled my inner Obama anger translator and envisioned how I wished the Georgia birther trial would go?   Well, the actual decision was rather anti-climatic, but absolutely apropos.

Judge Malihi wrote a ten-page page order that said, “Bitchez, please.  President Obama is an American citizen.  It doesn’t matter what you cracker-ass racists think because according to the gotdamn Constitution of the United States, the one you claim to love so damn fucking much, any person born in the United States, regardless of his parents’ countries of origin, is a gotdamn American citizen*.”  This means, of course, that President Obama is eligible to re-run for president in the state of Georgia.


(Click for more crazy birther shit)

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Posted in asiangrrlMN, Legal Shenanigans, Now That's Some Racist Bullsh*t

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Yooooo-Hooooo! Komen? Another of Your Grant Recipients is Affiliated with an Institute Under Investigation!

Posted on February 2, 2012 by | 4 Comments

Pssssst.  Komen.  You know the purported reason you cut funding to Planned Parenthood – because they are under federal investigation?  The rule you made up recently, right after hiring a rabid pro-forced-birther as VP of Public Policy?

You have another grant recipient who is in the same boat:  the Penn State Milton S. Hershey Medical Center, who is, of course, affiliated with Penn State University, which is, as you probably know, under  investigation for covering up alleged child rape by one of its employees. I linked to part four of the series I did on the issue, and it has links to the other three posts I wrote if you care to read more about the case.
(Click for more helpfulness)

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Posted in asiangrrlMN, Body/Health Shenanigans, War on Women

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